5 Ways to Feel More Loving and Connected with Life

Have you ever walked into a room to greet a baby as they wake from their nap?  At times, the glow from their soul is so strong, our breath is taken away.  Have you ever held an animal in your arms and felt their presence?  The aliveness in them can be so powerful that your body is filled with an intense love that permeates down your arms and legs.  Have you ever stepped into a forest in May and sensed the indescribable adorable-ness of every new leaf, sprout, and bud?  It’s hard to understand how you can forget the unimaginable beauty every year, only to be hit with it again each spring.

Deep inside your heart you have soul.  That soul is shining 100% of the time, just like the sun.  The full presence of that soul is what you feel so profoundly in that baby, animal, and forest.  I want you to know, that it is also in you.  It is in all of us.

If we do not notice this presence is shining 100% in us, this does not mean that it has lost its power, but rather it means that it has been covered up by layers.  Layer upon layer of culture’s rules dim the brightness of our spirit.  It is part of our journey to get lost in these layers.  And it is also part of our journey to eventually understand that the layers are causing us pain.  It is upon this understanding that we begin seeking a different way, and our seeking ultimately leads us back home to that soul deep inside our heart. 

Nothing taught me more about that soul than experiencing my dad’s death 7 years ago, after his battle with cancer.  In the months before his passing, I watched the activities he loved so dearly slowly fall away.  It began with him having to retire from emergency medicine because a stem cell transplant left his immune system unable to effectively protect his body.   Then came the sports.  “I can no longer road bike.”, he said.  And then “Golfing is over.”, he declared. 

When I noticed his hands too tense to play the piano, I saw him slump in his chair.  He turned to me and said “Everything is gone from my life.  I am not worth anything anymore.” I remember feeling so shocked that my beautiful dad, in his wise age, could be so wrong.  He had no idea the worth he had to me.  To our family.  Just sitting there in a chair, his presence was so deeply loved and appreciated. He was worth so much.  We are all worth so much just for being here.  What a lesson I learned in that moment. 

And then he eventually passed and the lesson was profound.  To feel the emptiness after he was gone made me realize how worthy one’s spirit is.  We don’t need to do anything to be worthy of love.  We are all worthy of love just for being.  The more we connect with that aliveness inside of ourselves, others, animals, and nature, the more it can emerge.

Here are 5 simple ways to feel more loving and connected to the presence inside of yourself, others, and the world.

1)     When reading to or playing with your child, designate a part of your attention to the warmth and presence inside of them.  Notice the aliveness in their body.  Feel the loving connection that exists between the two of you.

2)     Upon crossing paths with a small animal like a bird or squirrel, pause and observe them.  Notice how your mind can observe them through thought, at times with judgements and labels.  Then, feel how you can observe through your heart.  Feel the presence in the animal, and perhaps you may notice your body fill with a newfound love for the little being and for life itself.   

3)     While conversing with a friend, take your attention off your mind and bring it to your friend.  Perceive them through the eyes of your heart.  Appreciate the spirit that emanates through their speech and mannerisms.  Notice the love you feel for them, not for what they say or do but for their presence here with you in that moment.   

4)    Take a minute to bring your attention to your hands.  Feel them from the inside.  Perhaps you notice a tingling or pulsing.  This tingling or pulsing is your aliveness, and it is inside your entire body.  That aliveness is the same presence that lives in that beautiful baby, animal, and forest from the beginning of this article.  You are worthy of love just like them, not for what you have accomplished, but because you are here on this earth.

5)    Think of someone in your life who is deeply important to you.  Picture the way they talk, move, and show up in life.  Feel the love and warmth you have for them.  Now, ask yourself why you love them.  You may come up with a list of words.  Write this list down.  Take a look at the words you have written.  Note how many describe the way the individual makes you feel or the way they share your similar values, like honesty, compassion, and adventure.  And pay attention to how many words explain their career achievements, sport or activity accolades, popularity, or financial successes.  Your love for them, most likely, will have nothing to do with the latter.   You love them because you connect with that presence deep inside their heart.  It’s hard to find words to even describe that.

Learn more about using metaphor to teach about the soul in all of us in The Girl and The Sun book.